For a lone parent, free time is often a sum: who has the kids when, what it costs, who drives. Here is a year in Ireland, with things that work well when it is just you and the children, and a note on when it helps to meet up with other parents. Exact school holiday dates vary, so check your school's calendar.
Autumn: Halloween mid-term
The Halloween break is the first time in the school year that the arrangements get tested. Sort out early who has which days, and who does trick or treating, because both parents usually want it. Outdoors: a forest walk to kick leaves, a pumpkin patch, an evening of trick or treating on your own road. Indoors: the library, the local pool, a film afternoon.
Winter: Christmas and the long dark
Christmas is the hardest date of the year for separated parents. Many split Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, or alternate each year. What matters most is that the children know in advance where they will be. If you are on your own this year, plan the day on purpose: friends, family, a swim at the Forty Foot or a long walk, rather than just letting it happen.
December weekends with the kids can be simple: a trip to see the lights in town, baking, the panto if it fits the budget.
February: the mid-term break
Short, often wet, and easy to waste. Plan one thing a day and leave the rest loose: a museum morning, a soft play afternoon, a beach walk in wellies. If the children are with their other parent for that week, it is often your longest stretch of free time until Easter. A good window for you.
March: St Patrick's Day
A parade in town for the smaller ones, face paint, a bit of noise. If crowds are too much, the parades in smaller towns are often more fun for children anyway. Agree early which parent has the day.
Spring: Easter
An egg hunt in the garden or the park, the first proper cycle of the year on a greenway, lambs on a farm visit. The Easter holidays are usually easy to plan because they are the same for everyone. Decide in good time who has Easter Sunday.
Summer: the long stretch
Primary school children are off from the end of June, secondary even earlier, and the summer is a real challenge for parents on their own. Many split it into blocks of one, two or three weeks. For your weeks: the beach, summer camps, a few days in a mobile home, long days at the grandparents'. For the weeks without them: plan something, so the quiet house doesn't become a trap.
The long bright evenings are also the easiest time for a first meeting with someone new: a walk at eight in June, while the kids are with the other parent, is a gentle start.
Not doing it all alone
Many outings are better with a second family: the kids play together and the adults get to talk. In PAM there is Outings, where parents suggest things to do together, and the Little Market, where parents pass on children's things, from wetsuits to Communion shoes. The app is in English, and the community in Ireland is only getting started.
If a new relationship is on the cards, outings with the children are a good later step. When and how is in introducing a new partner to your children. More of the basics are in single parent dating in Ireland, and ideas for your city: Dublin, Cork, Galway.
Get PAM →Common questions
- How do separated parents usually share the summer holidays?
- Often in blocks of one to three weeks. The important thing is to agree it early and tell the children in good time where they will be.
- What can I do on Christmas Day without the kids?
- Plan it on purpose: friends, family, a walk or a sea swim. A planned day feels much lighter than one that just happens.
- How do I share Halloween with the other parent?
- Agree early who has the evening, or take turns each year. Children mostly want to know in advance and to be able to wear their costume for both of you.
- How can I meet other parents for outings?
- Through school, sports clubs or the library, and in PAM through Outings, where parents suggest things to do together.